Learning to listen

Many people never grow out of this childhood habit, and it negatively affects how they communicate, solve problems, and manage conflict (in the workplace and in personal relationships).

With the exception of a rare few, most people were told to listen, but not taught how to listen.

And blindly carrying this habit into one’s adult years makes it a skill worth rethinking and relearning.

In the words of Lord Rabbi Jonathan Sacks, z”l, “It takes training, focus and the ability to create silence in the soul to learn how to listen, whether to God or to a fellow human being. Seeing shows us the beauty of the created world, but listening connects us to the soul of another, and sometimes to the soul of the Other, God as He speaks to us, calls to us, summoning us to our task in the world.

If I were asked how to find God, I would say, Learn to listen. Listen to the song of the universe in the call of birds, the rustle of trees, the crash and heave of the waves. Listen to the poetry of prayer, the music of the Psalms. Listen deeply to those you love and who love you. Listen to the words of God in the Torah and hear them speak to you. Listen to the debates of the sages through the centuries as they tried to hear the texts’ intimations and inflections.

Don’t worry about how you or others look. The world of appearances is a false world of masks, disguises and concealments. Listening [can be simple, and it] is not easy. I confess I find it formidably hard. But listening alone bridges the abyss between soul and soul, self and other, I and the Divine.”